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"Appropriate Dress"
Legalistic Dress Codes
I have encountered people ruffled by the dress code some churches have imposed upon their members. They felt codes that said women should only wear dresses and no make up were oppressive. I wouldn't go so far as to say that's right, but we must consider important aspects most people wouldn't deny the reality of.
Let me describe the issue in this manner. First, do you feel there is any level of dress the church overseers should take a stand forbidding? Should a woman be allowed to come to church in her "lingerie"? A reasonable person would have to say, "NO!" Why? Such dress would be an obvious move to create lust in the men. It shouts the spirit of adultery (Matthew 5:27,28). The elders would have every right to take a stand of forbidding such lack of dress. (Even the laws of the land state there are legal and illegal standards.) The obvious applications of godliness tells us such dress anywhere in public would also be unacceptable by Christian women.
The next step leads us to the position, "there is a level the overseers must prohibit." Most should come to this conclusion, considering the previous scenario. If you happen to see this, the scowl of legalism must begin to falter.
Ah, but who is to decide what level is too low? Some women will emphatically deny their choice of dress is seductive. Ask the honest men in the congregation and you will hear a very different response. Another thought in "drawing the line in dress codes" is that the consensus of the men should be used to evaluate the standard of acceptability for the women. The whole point is whether or not it is seductive to the men. Who better to be able to make that evaluation than the men? (Since this is discussing the issue of women, I will not cover the men's dress code here, but the reverse is just as applicable to the men's standard being what is acceptable to the women.)
Since there's a point where a line must be drawn, it must be admitted that the charge of legalism is too quickly leveled against churches that say, "That's indecent, put more on!" The level may vary from town to town, but the overseers' decisions must be respected and not simply mocked or scorned. If you are a woman that finds yourself at an assembly that forbids wearing makeup anytime, you can have your husband or father address this concern with the overseers. (I say husband or father for the reason mentioned in the above paragraph.) Their final decision should be respected because they're held accountable for maintaining what they perceive necessary to keep the brethren in the path of godliness and purity. They may err in their decision, but the love of the body would dictate submission. Consider Romans Chapter 14 and the issue of not causing our brother to stumble through our freely eating meat offered to idols. For some, this may seem to ask the near impossible, but seek the Lord's face and you will find His direction, peace and ability.
Modesty:
9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array. 1 Timothy 2:9
In seeking the biblical view on appropriate dress, I believe the answer lies in understanding the key word, "modest". To start off with, this word translated as "modest" in 1 Timothy 2:9, is only used in one other place in the Bible. In that place it is use of a character called for in godly men, and is found only one chapter later, 1 Timothy 3:2. There it is translated as "good behaviour". Even though this article is specifically addressing women, we can see from the other usage that the same injunction is also called for upon men.
The definition of the word in 2:9 translated "modest" reads: modest - Greek: kosmios - orderly, that is decorous; - of good behaviour, modest.
From this we can glean that a woman's clothing should be proper with the consideration of proper dignity. This would not endorse seductive, proud, nor slovenly attire. This is clearly expounded on in the rest of the verse, "not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array."
In this verse we find another important word that helps to take a real honest evaluation at proper attire for women. The word "shamefacedness". It's definition reads: shamefacedness - Greek: aidos - bashfulness, that is, (towards men), modesty.
This word expounds on what biblical modesty is. A sense of bashfulness should attend the choice of attire a woman chooses in the presentation of herself before men. Instead of telling you what that means, let me ask you a question:
What would you expect to see in the clothing choice of a young, innocent woman who indeed was bashful towards young men?
The answer to that question is what Paul called for of all Christian women in the verse under consideration.
I think now you might understand why I said the word, "modest" is the key to understanding what God calls for in His daughters.
Let me put it to you in a reverse question. Think of the kind of attire you are seeing women wearing all around us these days, that which passes for regular daytime and "dressy" attire.
What would you think of the claims of a young woman to modesty and bashfulness who wears these types of clothes?
The honest answer to that question, is what non-Christians think of women who dress that way while claiming to be Christian. The testimony is blasphemous and shameful.
The Issue of Pants:
Let's take serious consideration in the choice of pants. The issue of a woman wearing pants has long been disputed. I don't believe it is necessarily wrong for women to wear pants, but there is a very serious critique point to be looked at. I remember being with my wife while she was looking for clothing. There were jeans of different companies hanging on the racks. I picked up one after another of those labels to read what their point of advertising was. Most of them pointed out the same basic information. The labeling told how they had skillfully designed these new jeans to show off the woman's body by being made of thinner fabric in certain areas and combined with a new fabric, Spandex® to enable the jeans to show off more. In writing this article, I made another trip to the local clothing department to see what the labels said more recently. The advertising was less overt in the wording. The Spandex® was still there, but the pictures told of the fit. The model's posses and the choice of tops said it all on some of the brands. The econo products were made to the basic pattern of the old-time farm girl who wasn't trying to seduce. The tops that were hanging on all the racks were now matches for what used to pass as underwear or "lingerie". Where the cut was not indecent, the fabric fulfilled that goal. Now polyester, nylon and Spandex® blends that enable clothing to be little more than "spray paint patterns" on a person.
A serious issue must be considered in the choice of pants. When the company purposely designs the pants to be seductive, you can't just wear those and ignore how they've been designed. Your denial doesn't change the designer's success, and your responsibility for how you adorn your body (which is the temple of God for Christians). If lust or sensuality is lying at the base of your clothing choices, you need to repent. If it's just comfort or laziness, that too calls for repentance. That shows lack of love for younger girls (to whom you are an example), to men and brethren for whom your carelessness is a source of temptation, and for the poor Christian testimony that you demonstrate to the world.
Clothing Showing Power:
The last consideration of clothing must address what is often fully decent, but goes awry in independent stance. It has become common for women to wear professional "women's suits" that are definitely for women, in often having a skirts, but carry the top of a man's suit. They even have ties for them now! The move in this style of women's clothing follows the women's liberationists in trying to look like a man by grabbing some more authoritative men's clothing. The suit of politicians, lawyers and salesmen. Such clothing bears an air of authority, and women try to carry that impression by wearing that design. Part of Mose's law forbidding women to wear the clothing of a man would have to be held up here for consideration. True godly women's dress clothing should never carry the air of "woman of power". Just like Paul addressed the importance of women having long hair because of the clear declaration of subjection to the man, so the clothing needs to be such that it never challenges. It should be carefully chosen to demonstrate subjection and godly declaration. It should be chosen to demonstrate modesty and shamefacedness, as well as to demonstrate dignity and faithfulness to the husband.
Clothing of Santification & Honour:
1 Furthermore then we beseech you, brethren, and exhort you by the Lord Jesus, that as ye have received of us how ye ought to walk and to please God, so ye would abound more and more. 2 For ye know what commandments we gave you by the Lord Jesus. 3 For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication: 4 That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour; 5 Not in the lust of concupiscence, even as the Gentiles which know not God. 1 Thessalonians 4:1-5
I have a good book on Christian Sex Education that holds to the more conservative value. An Abeka book. In it, you find the statement that women shouldn't wear shorts that end above the knees. I thought, "well here is a modest ideal, but what scriptural basis for saying this high and no more?" I'd like to know if there is one. I can't find a list of rules for dress, but there are principals. The book I would highly recommend on the subject of dress is Christian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America by Jeff Pollard and available through Vision Forum. It lays an excellent background on the historical evolution of the bathing suit in America. It is definitely an eye-opener. I will leave the arguments of how long or how short in the hands of this aforementioned book.
Personally, when I'm in the presence of a woman who has tights on, I feel embarrassed. I feel like I'm standing in front of someone who hasn't finished getting dressed. If a woman's dress makes a man, who cares about godliness, feel bad or embarrassed in her presence, she should "finish dressing". Since the woman doesn't have the same visual temptation the man has, she needs to take extra care to be modest. Her sense of discernment can't match the man's in this area. What seems harmless to her, may be overwhelming to a man.
Bear in mind, the Bible says each spouse has power over their spouse's body:
4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. 1 Corinthians 7:4
We find guidance in this. Look at it this way: the husband shouldn't wear anything in public, that the wife doesn't feel comfortable with him wearing. A godly woman isn't going to want other women looking at her husband's body. If the wife is hosting a women's luncheon at home, and in came her husband decked out in his exercise Spandex® outfit, she should rightly be embarrassed. It's her shame that's being displayed to her guests. That's why, in the Old Testament, when you uncovered someone's nakedness, it tells whose nakedness was really being uncovered. For example:
8 The nakedness of thy father's wife shalt thou not uncover: it is thy father's nakedness. Leviticus 18:8
The spouse's sense of shame should be honored. That also goes for the woman not wearing what the husband doesn't feel comfortable with her publicly wearing. This isn't a perfect check system, but it at least creates a system of two check points for appropriateness of a married person's apparel. Their own, and their spouse's.
Modesty in Conduct
The final area of application of modesty breaches into an almost taboo area. Modesty is not just something which covers clothing. It's a demeanor that governs one's total conduct. I'm mentioning it because I'm seeing it is becoming accepted as perfectly moral to behave in immodest ways towards those of the opposite sex, or speak immodestly in front of such. The call to modesty must govern here as well, or else the modesty that is practiced is nothing but a farce, a make believe.
Under the guise of a "medical environment" people go in to businesses for massages or enter the field as masseuses. For a woman to massage a woman is not indecent, but to cross the privacy barrier between the sexes breaches the most basic code of modesty. People have been trained to accept stripping down in front of others as of no consequence as long as the term "clinic" can be applied somewhere. A conditioning of our modern fallen society. The call to a modest heart and life is so vital that to sacrifice this for the sake of convenience in living in our typical society is a sacrifice too great to pay. There are always solutions acceptable to take care of the body, but to sacrifice the state of one's soul for the body is wickedness. Take care of the soul first, and the provisions for the body will be found if you really want and need them. Jesus gave a promise that applies well here:
31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? 32 (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. 33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Matthew 7:31-33
Women of Example
The immoral standard of today's dress is so prevalent that people take notice when they see a woman in modest, decent, respectable clothing. The scene wasn't so alien back in the 1970's. There were still plenty of women in America who dressed respectably at that time. The situation has drastically changed. Back then, a woman who went around dressed respectably didn't draw gawkers. Not so now. My wife and daughter have drawn stares of disbelief, and comments like, "wow, I can tell you and your daughter are respectable" from strangers they weren't even engaged in conversation with. On the other hand, others point and laugh. The amount of women who live by such a standard of dress is so rare that for those who do, it seems as if the response of others is becoming like that once only held toward Amish or Hutterite dress. The people gawk and look on in wonder. To dress decently really makes a powerful statement these days. Dress to the glory of God!
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 Free to Copy under Creative Commons BY-NC-ND3.0 License by Darrell Farkas
All quotations are from the King James Version of the Bible
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